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My Weekend...

First off, I just wanted to say thanks to all my awesome friends. Derek, Ashleigh, Cristi, Craig, Jason, Toby, Gene, Brian, and Marcus. I had a really awesome weekend, and it was all because of you guys. So thank you! Friday was Toby's birthday dinner, and we went to Broadway Grill. The acoustics in that room sucked balls, so I couldn't really talk to anyone but Brian, Marcus and Stephen, but the food was good, and me and Marcus has a fun art discussion. Afterward we all just kind of hung out for a bit and had a fun little discussion of musical tastes and how they differ person to person. Lol. Then Saturday, I got up early to clean and decorate for The Nightmare on Elm St. Party, and then afterward, I went to the Asian art museum with Craig, Jason, Gene, Toby, and Brian. It was a pretty cool exhibit, and I'm glad I got to go. After that, I came home, finished some last minute stuff and then everyone came over for movies. We made it through the first four Nightmare on Elm St movies before people started falling asleep, but all in all, it was a fun night for me. Sunday kinda sucked for the most part, but I did get to have a Tokyo club. (God I love that sandwich) and toward the end of the day, I got to go play Monopoly with Derek, Ashleigh, Cristi, and Ashleigh's friends Tyler.


I am feeling very melancholy right now, and I'm really not 100 % sure why. It is really frustrating because I've had a lot of fun recently between all the parties and hanging out I've done, but at the same time, there is just this general since of ennui that I can't seem to escape... Well, hopefully the party this weekend will knock me out of this funk. Honestly if watching a bunch of classic somewhat campy slasher movies with 20 or so of my friends can't knock me out of this funk, then nothing can.

Meh, I think I just need to focus on the good. I've got a fantastic boyfriend, excellent friends, a good home, an awesome collection of Lucario stuff, and I'm actually really glad I moved to Seattle. I've done so many things since I moved here that I never would have been able to do in Arizona. It's also even brought me out of my shell a little bit. Not an easy task! Honestly, it is hard for me to be social. I remember it used to come so much easier, and I used to just like everyone, but now, it is hard for me. I don't know why. I kind of had a complete change of personality back in 2003 when everything fell apart... Honestly, this is the closest I've ever gotten to being like I was back then.

I think maybe part of this stupid feeling I have is fear. I'm happy with my life, so I kind of half expect everything to just fall apart. It's so dumb that I can still let things that happened so long ago fuck with me that much, but honestly I do think that is part of the problem. The other part is work, and just this feeling of disdain I've had for my job and my boss since my review, and then the whole taking the bonus back.

Meh.. I just need to relax. Maybe draw, and listen to some music. I just not sure I'm going to have a chance to do so anytime soon. Maybe Sunday after the party...
I've been really tired and kind of out of it the last few weeks. I tend to be a bit of an insomniac, and if I get stressed out at all, I have a hard time sleeping. Recently I have been really stressed about money due to something stupid at work. A couple weeks ago, I got a bonus, I was really excited and used it for a couple frivolous things, and the rest of it went toward more responsible things like new glasses, a dentist trip, and mine and Stephens savings. Well what I didn't realize was I was overpaid my bonus they gave me twice what they were supposed to. They eventually realized their mistake, so now they have to take it out of my next two pay checks, which makes money really tight. Stephen is going to be helping me out with some of the bills I normally pay, but I just hate feeling like I'm a financial drain, or burden. I know I shouldn't feel like I' m a mooch, since we are in a serious relationship and have shared finances anyways, but it really freaks me out for some reason. So I've been stressed about that. That coupled with the fact that I've worked a bunch of double shifts this week, and have been really busy with other stuff when I'm not at work has left me tired, drained, and kind of left me really hating my job. It just feels like I never have as much free time as I'd like. I know it is a stupid thing to complain about, but I just wish I had more time to draw, and hang out with friends. I only work 45 hours a week, but when you factor in the fact I spend an hour getting to work, and an hour coming home every day (The magic of traffic) Work takes up like 55 hours a week. Anyways, I know that was a lot of whining, so for anyone who had the patience to sit through my emo post, here is a kink test.....

Also just a side note, I kind of half disagree with the results of this test. I'm far more vanilla in my tastes then this seems to think I am.

Your result for The Kink Spectrum Analysis Test...

Blue (450 nm)

You scored 58% self-confidence and 52% bandwidth!

Wow! You have quite a big repertoire when it comes to kinky sex. And you're probably also willing to play on either side of the fence. You should look for another Blue, or an Ultraviolet if you want to broaden your horizon. Greens may be okay as well but will probably bore you after a while. Reds are too vanilla for you.

But I promised you a more detailed analysis, so here it is. Note that most scales are twofold: There are separate values for giving (active) and receiving (passive). If you scored high on one of them, you should look for a partner who scored high on the other. If you scored high on both of them, go for someone who is similar (or for multiple partners if you're into that). If you scored low on both, this probably is not your kind of kink.

You scored 80% giving and 62% receiving on oral.

You scored 89% giving and 80% receiving on anal.

You scored 46% giving and 57% receiving on bondage.

You scored 52% giving and 38% receiving on humiliation.

You scored 17% giving and 10% receiving on pain.

You scored 48% dominance and 43% submission.

You scored 50% voyeurism and 35% exhibitionism.

Besides that, you're 50% into fetishism and 68% polysexual (i.e. interested in sex with multiple partners, whether at the same time or not). You'll probably want a partner who is similar, whether you scored high or low in these categories.

Finally, you scored 24% on autoerotic - a scale that measures your ability and/or willingness to have kinky fun without a partner. It's not exactly a matching criterion, but it's good for you if your score is high. Keep it up!

Take The Kink Spectrum Analysis Test at OkCupid

Leather Pride at The Cuff.

Okay, so last night was fucking fantastic! I had to work in the morning yesterday, but I got off super early, and went over to Nightcats. Stephen and I hung out there for a bit with a lot of the local furs, we had a barbecue, I talked with a lot of people, laughed at a retarded kid begging for food, and wrestled with someone who was trying to handcuff me (It has been awhile since I've been manhandled, it was kind of fun) Afterward, we went with a big group of friends (Including my awesome friend Ashleigh who is officially the hottest chick on the planet) to a leather pride celebration at The Cuff (My favorite bar in Seattle) I drank, and danced (Okay I didn't really dance so much as wiggled around like I was having a seizure. I really can't fucking dance at all, and really wish I could, but I completely lack rhythm) Oh and my significant other was wearing his leash, and I kind of passed him around the dance floor, and I discovered that he looks really sexy sandwiched between other guys. But yeah, a fagtastic time was had by all!

Afterward, Ashleigh wasn't in any shape to drive home, so I drove her and Kit to 7-11, then Burger King, and then finally back to our apartment where all three of us crashed. Then, this morning continued the awesome trend. I got up pretty early, to give Ashleigh a ride back to her car, and I got to catch The End's Sunday morning acoustic show. I really love acoustic tracks, and they played quite a few good ones. It was a really spectacular way to start the day. After dropping her off, me and Kit went to breakfast at a nice small town style dinner near our apartment. It was a good breakfast, and reminded me of the food and people of AZ. (In a surprisingly good way)

Now I think I'm going to listen to my Live Flogging Molly CD (Via headphones since Stephen hates them), and draw for a bit. Then, later tonight, we are going to go see How To Train Your Dragon. I'm not sure if anyone is going with us, or if it is going to be just me and Kit, but either way, this has been a really wonderful weekend. I really am so glad I moved to Seattle, I just couldn't have these kind of experiences back in AZ.

More Questions Answered!

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/ookaminobaka I answered a few more.

And the academy award goes to.... Me!

I've been having a kind of lousy week with work. My boss has me in a noose and is basically threatening to tighten it. I understand that he needs his district to do better, but subtly threatening to fire someone who you know isn't actually part of the problem, seems kinda horrible. So, I've been super stressed out about that, and have slowly been looking for a new job, but it's kind of hard though to find a stable jobs, that I qualify for, that make as much money as I need. Meh. Hopefully, I will be able to get my CE scores up, and I won't have to worry about this anymore.

So despite all the stress at work, the rest of my life is going pretty damn well. I'm drawing more. Drawn a few pictures for local Seattle friends, and have a bunch more I want to draw when I get the chance. I have been attempting to eat better and exercise more, and am making a bit of progress. Two steps forward, one step back. Lol. So yeah, things are pretty damn good on the home front as it were. Also, last night Stephen and I had an Oscar party; well actually, it was more of a get together then a party, but still, it was fun.

We just had a few friends come over, drink, eat, and watch the Oscars. We invited a lot of people including some of our coworkers, but a lot of people already had plans just cause we kind of decided to do it at the last minute. Really though, our apartment is pretty small, so if everyone had come over that we invited it would have been a really packed house. Lol. But yeah, Derek, Ashleigh, Cristi, Damien, Jin, Craig and Jason all managed to stop by and hang out for a bit. I had a lot of fun, got really drunk, and tried something I have never tried before. The thing I hadn't tried was a fairly interesting experience. Lol. So thank you Damien for helping me with that, and also a big thank you to everyone who came and hung out with us. You guys are all extremely awesome!

Lazy Day...

Now that I am back from my trip I finally answered the few questions I had on this thing. http://formspring.me/ookaminobaka and now I'm just kind of relaxing and drawing/coloring. Lazy days are nice. I really really enjoy the days I don't work. Lol. I need to find a new job, but that isn't exactly easy to do in this economy, especially in the pay scale I need, so for now, I'll just be happy that I have a job at all, and enjoy the days when I don't have to work.

Achievement Unlocked: Jumped on Bandwagon

Okay, so sometimes I'm more of an easily lead sheep then I am a wolf, but anyways, I'm jumping on a bandwagon. Ask me anything.